It's been a good two years since my last personal posting so I'm not sure how this is going to turn out but here goes for all my followers who have been wondering about what's going on in our world!
It's been a roller coaster the past two - three years. Shortly after becoming parents in 2011 it's been one health battle after another in our family of four. This has kept us working hard taking care of one another and pretty exhausted most days!
Our big scare this year was in January. Bill went to the ER for Kidney pain and came home with the news that he had spots on his lungs! WOW... did that ever send us into a whirlwind... if you've been through a cancer scare you know all the fears and what if's that go through your mind. It was a long 4 month process to wait and see if the spots had grown. Praise God they did not and all the other tests were all negative in light of cancer signs!
However during the waiting period I couldn't stop thinking about our girls... how could it be part of God's plan to orphan them yet again after sending us to rescue them... I was beside myself with these thoughts and how I just knew God had been preparing me for single parenting through all our experiences as parents the past three years. Finally I had to decide if I was going to trust God or not!
The last 22 years of my life has been a journey of trusting God and watching Him deliver on His promises and on His Word. After weeks of mind games I finally made a choice to put my fears aside and trust in God. I had to believe that taking Bill was not His plan for us and I should keep focusing on treatment plans while seeking God for direction to the best doctors and specialist.
I said all that to say this... I am at a cross road yet again to TRUST OR NOT TO TRUST God.
This time came a bit harder to jump out of the boat and walk on the water. I do have two kids to consider. The two girls God has blessed us with makes this step of faith the hardest ever.
I have chosen to follow a call from God to return to Peru this October. This is the same place God called me to go in 2010 where I also received the call to adoption and that is what set us on the path to connecting us with our precious girls!
Earlier this year a dear young pastor whom I was blessed to be acquainted with passed away.. His memorial service was so incredible. Just the person he was and the way he loved his God, family and his ministry was very touching.
The last time I ever spoke to him I had the opportunity to introduce him to our children we adopted as a result of his churches ongoing relationship and mission project in Peru. He was happy to meet them and said "So when are you going back?' Little did I know that those would be the last words I ever heard from him.
You know how some things just keep floating around in your head... well those words have haunted me for the better part of this year.
When God speaks His first and last mention are significant, I suppose the same can be said of those we love, we tend to remember things like that...
It so happens that I have heard this particular song, "Give Me Your Eyes", 33 times just between the end of June and the end of August. How do I know you say??? Because I have been hearing this song repeatedly since about January. I noticed I was hearing it frequently and I just assumed the artist was coming to town at first buuuuuuut, I keep hearing it, and it's not a new song so they aren't playing it because he's on tour! I decided to start keeping track of how many times a day I actually hear this song.
The song is significant because While on the Peru trip in 2010 I struggled with understanding why God had called me to go and so when I heard these lyrics "show me what I've been missing" In that moment those words broke me and drew me to a point where I asked God to "show me what I've been missing" Incidentally my prayer immediately led my eyes, ears and heart to see, hear and feel that call to Adoption.
I have not been the wife mother or friend I had always envisioned I would be after the Adoption. Somewhere I lost myself. I have battled with depression which I have learned stems from my unmet expectation of what parenting looks like. I am much better than I have been but I still slip back into a lot of wrong thinking and actions more often than I would like and more often than I feel is normal.
I need to go on this trip coming up in October to be recharged and regain my eternal perspective on this life. I need to serve on a different level than I have been for the past 3 years.
I have to go for me and for my God who I have grown distant.
I know that I need to reconnect on a deeper level with the Lord and once I have that again I know I will return to the woman, wife, mother and friend I want to be.
Most of the time I would say I am not happy with who I have become or the way I talk and act most of the time especially toward my children and husband. Those are the ones I don't want to treat this way most. It's NOT NOT NOT who I am...
I have to again choose to trust God on this... I don't want to be away from my family and I have some physical limitations right now that bring me fear that I won't be able to keep up on the team. I want to claim this Bible verse God brought me too today
Exodus15:26 And said, If thou wilt diligently hearken to the voice of the LORD thy God, and wilt do that which is right in his sight, and wilt give ear to his commandments, and keep all his statutes, I will put none of these diseases upon thee, which I have brought upon the Egyptians: for I am the LORD that healeth thee.
Mostly it is the first and last portions of this verse that ring out to me, Diligently LISTEN to God's voice, Do what is right, KEEP His ways... and the end says that the LORD HEALS!
I am choosing to trust in this... why else would God have directed me to it just after I told one of the leaders I may have to donate my plane ticket to someone else if I can't get this health issue resolved.
I am trying hard to hear God's voice but it's hard to be still sometimes with two little ones. I am happy for the fall schedule coming up that will allow me more opportunities for some time to be still and listen!
I choose to trust what I have heard and I choose to trust God will direct me to healing!
To God be the Glory! Psalm 30:12 To the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Saturday, December 15, 2012
My Granny
Girdy,
You have run your race; you have
finished your course…
I believe the Lord will say to you: “Well
done, thou good and faithful servant.”
I can’t remember a time when ANYONE
needed her or something from her that she didn’t give it to them even if that
meant she had to go without. It was ALWAYS others before herself no matter
what.
I have a million memories of you
Girdy and they ALL make me smile! To name just one recently, when I took you,
Alyssa and my girls to McDonalds then let you drive the last block home in our
loaner BIG car… Now that was fun and I love the smile it brought to your face
just to drive one last time! Life just isn’t the same without you here Girdy…I
know you thought you were just in the way but your presence was all I needed. I
love your smile and to hear your laughter. I already miss you calling me Suzie
and Katie … to those who don’t know why I call you Girdy… it’s because I can
never remember you ever calling me by my name…except maybe when I was in
trouble… so on our most memorable trip to Ada Oklahoma I gave you a new name
too!!!
I am betting this is how Beau and
Scoop got their nick names… their sis must have given it to them when they were
kids! Until this week none of us knew her brothers real names were NOT Beau and
Scoop!!!
OH GIRDY… I love you!
I think one thing anyone who knew
you would also remember is your passion to win the sweepstake! How I loved
going through your room this week to find your notes to two different
sweepstakes indicating that you didn’t have a donation at this time but IF you
did win to please withhold that portion from your winnings!!! Again, you make
me laugh!
I also found two certificates in
your honor for supporting U.S Veterans through charitable donations. I am
certain we don’t really know just how giving you were but I realized as I
sorted through your things that God gave me a husband in Bill that has the same
heart as you to help others in need and who also likes his sweepstakes too! What
a blessed granddaughter I am!
I know I made you promise to stay
with us until we got our girls & even though your body was ready to go your
heart was willing to stay… I remember the first time you gave me a gift for
mother’s day… I wasn’t even old enough to have kids but you just wanted to give
me a gift… and when I struggled to have children I know it broke your heart. I have truly enjoyed watching you pour that
unending love you give so freely into Jordin and Jayda these past 14 months. I
am so glad you got to enjoy them and I will make sure they know how much they
are loved by you.
As I have sorted through memories
and photos this week and remembered our last conversation on your birthday
about my favorite memory of being at your house when I was little… how I loved
to look through your photo albums… so today it struck me that must be where I
developed my passion for photography and I hope to pass that passion on to my
girls… I have several albums around my house now too and hope many children
will love it as much as I did with you!
These words are only a tid bit of all that I
hold in my heart of our time on earth together Girdy.
If I had to sum you up in only 2
words, they would be Enduring & Loving.
I didn't realize how much you are a
part of who I am and how much I will miss you until now…
Thanks be to the Lord for giving me
the gift of such a loving and fun Granny for a full 87 years.
I know I’ll see you in heaven one
day, so until then… I’ll run my race and finish my course.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Worst Best Incident...
I can't believe I'm even going to write this but feel as if I should for a reminder to myself, as help to others & to my Lord & God credit due for His mighty way!
This weekend Bill had to travel out of town for business so it's going to be ALL GIRLS weekend YAY!!!
Friday we picked up Aunt Amy & headed to the Harrisonville Festival. Oh how the girls had so much fun on the rides & dancing to 'therest' music.
It was so great to have someone along to help out with the girls...
We got home late, went to bed & rose early on saturday to a somewhat normal routine except it was Aunt Amy here not daddy.
In the afternoon Aunt Robin came over too & they sent me off for some much needed 'ME' time!
Then it was off to meet up with Aunt Val & pick up our brides maid dresses for Robin's wedding. I was so much appreciating all this extra help managing the girls through this day.
We all headed to Chic-Fil-A ... Robin's favorite place... : ) for a late lunch & play time for the little girls...
After lunch we headed to Marshals department store to help the bride to be something fun for her bachelorette party dress!
Jordin was having such a great time helping pick out flashy beautiful dresses... she LOVES dresses & dressing up!
So were shopping away & Jayda speaks up... "POOP, mommy poop!" In Jayda terms that means she has to go pee pee...or in the store it means I'm tired of sitting in this basket & I want to get out of here...
So I tell the girls I'm taking Jayda to the potty, one of the girls offers to take the basket, I didn't hesitate to leave it with her and also instructed Jordin to stay there as well.... We talked about the basket directly, but not Jordin...
I go off with Jayda in arm to the potty of which she didn't even go... little stinker!
I check the message that came through on my phone; it informs me that everyone is back in the dressing room now.
I take Jayda and head to the dressing room.
As soon as I arrive I visually take inventory of who is present... I ask "where is Jordin, in there with Robin?"
Amy & Val look at each other then back at me stating "NO, I thought she was with you!"
I quickly leave Jayda with them and take off to search for Jordin, surprisingly calm... I thank the Lord for that...
I go to the restroom thinking she must have followed me there & I didn't know it...
I enter & see no one, so I call out... "JORDIN... are you in here?!" No one replies...
I become increasingly concerned... I step out from the restroom area looking around every direction... I start yelling out her name... JORDIN.... JORDIN... my eye catches Amy & Val searching also... then I see Amy running to the front of the store... as I look ahead to where she is running to I then see Jordin at the front with an Employee!
I am immediately at ease knowing she is in the store & safe!
Amy scoops her up quickly!
Mommy right on Amy's heels as I got to Jordin I could see she had been crying & scared...
I took her into my arms, held her tight & asked her if she was ok... I assured her I was so glad she was ok & that we found her...
I then reminded her of why Mommy & Daddy have rules! (to keep her safe!)
I held her for a long time... she did not want me to let her go.
Oh my gosh... the what if's in this story are horrific...
I could point fingers & place blame...I could say it's Jayda's fault since she lied about having to go potty.... I could blame Jordin for not obeying mommy... but truely...I am to blame.. she is my child I am ultimately responsible for her at ALL times.
Luk 2:44 But they, supposing him to have been in the company, went a day's journey; and they sought him among their kinsfolk and acquaintance.
This weekend Bill had to travel out of town for business so it's going to be ALL GIRLS weekend YAY!!!
Friday we picked up Aunt Amy & headed to the Harrisonville Festival. Oh how the girls had so much fun on the rides & dancing to 'therest' music.
It was so great to have someone along to help out with the girls...
We got home late, went to bed & rose early on saturday to a somewhat normal routine except it was Aunt Amy here not daddy.
In the afternoon Aunt Robin came over too & they sent me off for some much needed 'ME' time!
Then it was off to meet up with Aunt Val & pick up our brides maid dresses for Robin's wedding. I was so much appreciating all this extra help managing the girls through this day.
We all headed to Chic-Fil-A ... Robin's favorite place... : ) for a late lunch & play time for the little girls...
After lunch we headed to Marshals department store to help the bride to be something fun for her bachelorette party dress!
Jordin was having such a great time helping pick out flashy beautiful dresses... she LOVES dresses & dressing up!
So were shopping away & Jayda speaks up... "POOP, mommy poop!" In Jayda terms that means she has to go pee pee...or in the store it means I'm tired of sitting in this basket & I want to get out of here...
So I tell the girls I'm taking Jayda to the potty, one of the girls offers to take the basket, I didn't hesitate to leave it with her and also instructed Jordin to stay there as well.... We talked about the basket directly, but not Jordin...
I go off with Jayda in arm to the potty of which she didn't even go... little stinker!
I check the message that came through on my phone; it informs me that everyone is back in the dressing room now.
I take Jayda and head to the dressing room.
As soon as I arrive I visually take inventory of who is present... I ask "where is Jordin, in there with Robin?"
Amy & Val look at each other then back at me stating "NO, I thought she was with you!"
I quickly leave Jayda with them and take off to search for Jordin, surprisingly calm... I thank the Lord for that...
I go to the restroom thinking she must have followed me there & I didn't know it...
I enter & see no one, so I call out... "JORDIN... are you in here?!" No one replies...
I become increasingly concerned... I step out from the restroom area looking around every direction... I start yelling out her name... JORDIN.... JORDIN... my eye catches Amy & Val searching also... then I see Amy running to the front of the store... as I look ahead to where she is running to I then see Jordin at the front with an Employee!
I am immediately at ease knowing she is in the store & safe!
Amy scoops her up quickly!
Mommy right on Amy's heels as I got to Jordin I could see she had been crying & scared...
I took her into my arms, held her tight & asked her if she was ok... I assured her I was so glad she was ok & that we found her...
I then reminded her of why Mommy & Daddy have rules! (to keep her safe!)
I held her for a long time... she did not want me to let her go.
Oh my gosh... the what if's in this story are horrific...
I could point fingers & place blame...I could say it's Jayda's fault since she lied about having to go potty.... I could blame Jordin for not obeying mommy... but truely...I am to blame.. she is my child I am ultimately responsible for her at ALL times.
As the mother, I allowed myself to become too comfortable with others helping me keep track of my girls, shame on me... I need my friends to know that if it were me that was in a group with the parent of someone else & their child was present, I would fully expect that parent was looking after their own child & I would not be as alert to where they were. It's NOT your fault!
I heard Jordin calling my name as I walked away, I should have turned around, shame on me again.
I was trusting her to obey me as I had instructed her to stay there. She knows the store rule is to never leave the basket... I was also trusting she would obey that rule as well...
Lesson for mommy...children disobey
Lesson for mommy...children disobey
Lesson for mommy... ALWAYS review rules when going to the store... repetition is the price of learning... (i usually do, but didn't this day!)
Lesson for mommy... put into practice what our children should do if they should ever be separated from mommy in the store again...
- scream as loud as you can MOMMY
- know mommy's name
- stay in the last place we were together & I will always come back to that spot DON'T LEAVE
- Know Mommy & Daddy's names
- know your phone number & how to dial it on the phone
Praise our God and King we were reunited & no harm was done... Thank you Lord for meeting me in the midst of it all... thank you for your sovereign hand of mercy & grace...thank you for directing our path today.
I am SO over joyed that it's over, it was short and we are all safe and sound...let it be a learning opportunity for us as a family.
I am SO over joyed that it's over, it was short and we are all safe and sound...let it be a learning opportunity for us as a family.
I am still in awe of God and how he maintained my head that it was clear as I searched for Jordin, that I knew to go back to where she may have been, to go back to where we were last together & that he directed Amy's eyes to see her at the front of the store!!!
As I continually replay the events over & over in my mind, trying to figure out just how; I am going to explain this to Daddy when I talk to him or see him again. My mind tells me "he will never trust me again, God CHOSE us to be their parents... & I LOST JORDIN!" and these two thoughts haunted me all night & all morning.
Sunday the girls & I head off to church. I Dropped off Jayda to the nursery as usual then Jordin & I head to adult worship. After wordhip Jordin was going to childrens church so I stop her & reminded her to obey the teacher & STAY with her class... she replies "yes mom, I WONT wander off!"
I think she learned a valuable lesson!
Sitting in my seat feeling lonely, I begin to replay the events in my mind again...I ask the Lord, "please speak to my heart & mind, bring me some peace through Your word today."
As I listen to pastor Scott's sermon on abuse, he breaks it down in 4 perspectives, Self, Others, David & Jesus...my mind begins focusing on Jesus... and then it wanders to Joseph and Mary... Jesus' parents!
God reminds me that Joseph & Mary also lost track of Jesus... THE SON OF GOD as well!!!
My heart was comforted & the tears began flowing... so thankful God chose to include this part of Jesus' life just for me & others who may have dealt with the same thing!
I began processing the events of Joseph & Mary's situation... they were CHOSEN parents too!
They were traveling & surrounded by their community... trusted friends & family... they too were comfortable & secure that their child was in a safe environment.
BUT... they too could not find him...their story is much like mine!!!
Check out their experience:
Luk 2:41 Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the passover.
Luk 2:42 And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem after the custom of the feast.
Luk 2:43 And when they had fulfilled the days, as they returned, the child Jesus tarried behind in Jerusalem; and Joseph and his mother knew not of it. Luk 2:44 But they, supposing him to have been in the company, went a day's journey; and they sought him among their kinsfolk and acquaintance.
Luk 2:45 And when they found him not, they turned back again to Jerusalem, seeking him.
Luk 2:46 And it came to pass, that after three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the doctors, both hearing them, and asking them questions.
I am sure taking inspirational comfort from this story at the parental perspective... they lost him for 3 days... I can imagine they retraced their last moments with him, where they were last together as they journeyed back to find him.
Parents... please even when you're in your most trusted circle of people... have GOOD communication with them... if you leave your child with them be certain that they make eye contact with you and that you hear them say "YES I have ... (child's name)."
Even more important... MAKE SURE YOUR CHILD KNOWS WHAT TO DO IF EVER SEPARATED FROM YOU OR THEIR ADULT BEFORE SOMETHING LIKE THIS EVER HAPPENS...
We had not ever talked about this until it happened... IT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE...it happened to the parents... the CHOSEN parents of the Son of God... it CAN happen to you!
Even more important... MAKE SURE YOUR CHILD KNOWS WHAT TO DO IF EVER SEPARATED FROM YOU OR THEIR ADULT BEFORE SOMETHING LIKE THIS EVER HAPPENS...
We had not ever talked about this until it happened... IT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE...it happened to the parents... the CHOSEN parents of the Son of God... it CAN happen to you!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
It Takes Two...
It
takes 2 people to make a relationship....
& it takes 2 to KEEP it going... 1 person can make a difference but 1
person can not maintain the relationship ALONE... at some point the other
person has to engage.
I love the movie
'FireProof' & the 4 yr anniversary of this movie is on the 26th of
September! It's a good time to rent this movie & or even take the love dare
to restore or revitalize our marriages! Take a dare & renew your love!
THE LOVE DARE
40 Days Love Journey
Day 1: Love is patient
Be completely humble and gentle; be
patient, bearing with one another in
love.
—Ephesians 4:2 NIV
TODAY’S DARE
The first part of this dare is fairly
simple.
Although love is communicated in a
number of ways, our words often reflect
the condition of our heart. For the next
day, resolve to demonstrate patience and
to say nothing negative to your spouse at
all. If the temptation arises, choose not
to
say anything. It’s better to hold your
tongue than to say something you’ll
regret
Day 2: Love is kind
Be kind to one another, tender-hearted,
forgiving each other, just as God in
Christ also has forgiven you.
—Ephesians 4:32
TODAY’S DARE
In addition to saying nothing negative to
your spouse again today, do at least one
unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.
Day 3: Love is not
selfish
Be devoted to one
another in brotherly
love; give
preference to one another in
honor.
—Romans 12:10
TODAY’S DARE
Whatever you put
your time, energy, and
money into will
become more important
to you. It’s hard to
care for something
you are not
investing in. Along with
restraining from
negative comments, buy
your spouse
something that says, “I was
thinking of you
today.”
Day 4: Love is thoughtful
How precious also are Your thoughts to
me. . . .How vast is the sum of them! If
I
should count them, they would
outnumber the sand.
—Psalm 139:17–18
TODAY’S DARE
Contact your spouse sometime during
the business of the day. Have no agenda
other than asking how he or she is doing
and if there is anything you could do for
them.
Day 5: Love is not rude
He who blesses his friend with a loud
voice early in the morning, it will be
reckoned a curse to him.
—Proverbs 27:14
TODAY’S DARE
Ask your spouse to tell you three things
that cause him or her to be
uncomfortable or irritated with you. You
must do so without attacking them or
justifying your behavior. This is from
their perspective only.
Day 6: Love is not irritable
He who is slow to anger is better than
the mighty, and he who rules his spirit,
than he who captures a city.
—Proverbs 16:32
TODAY’S DARE
Choose today to react to tough
circumstances in your marriage in loving
ways instead of with irritation. Begin by
making a list below of areas where you
need to add margin to your schedule.
Then list any wrong motivations that you
need to release from your life.
Day 7: Love believes the
best
[Love] believes all things, hopes all
things.
—1 Corinthians 13:7
TODAY’S DARE
For today’s dare, get two sheets of
paper.
On the first one, spend a few minutes
writing out positive things about your
spouse. Then do the same with negative
things on the second sheet. Place both
sheets in a secret place for another day.
There is a different purpose and plan for
each. At some point during the
remainder of the day, pick a positive
attribute from the first list and thank
your spouse for having this
characteristic.
Day 8: Love is not jealous
Love is as strong as death, its jealousy
unyielding as the grave. It burns like
blazing fire.
—Song of Solomon 8:6 NIV
TODAY’S DARE
Determine to become your spouse’s
biggest fan and to reject any thoughts of
jealousy. To help you set your heart on
your spouse and focus on their
achievements, take yesterday’s list of
negative attributes and discreetly burn
it.
Then share with your spouse how glad
you are about a success he or she
recently enjoyed.
Day 9: Love makes good
impressions
Greet one another with a kiss of love.
—1 Peter 5:14
TODAY’S DARE
Think of a specific way you’d like to
greet your spouse today. Do it with a
smile and with enthusiasm. Then
determine to change your greeting to
reflect your love for them.
Day 10: Love is
unconditional
God demonstrates His own love toward
us, in that while we were yet sinners,
Christ died for us.
—Romans 5:8
TODAY’S DARE
Do something out of the ordinary today
for your spouse—something that proves
(to you and to them) that your love is
based on your choice and nothing else.
Wash her car. Clean the kitchen. Buy his
favorite dessert. Fold the laundry.
Demonstrate love to them for the sheer
joy of being their partner in marriage.
Day 11: Love cherishes
Husbands ought also to love their own
wives as their own bodies.
—Ephesians 5:28
TODAY’S DARE
What need does your spouse have that
you could meet today? Can you run an
errand? Give a back rub or foot massage?
Is there housework you could help with?
Choose a gesture that says, “I cherish
you” and do it with a smile.
Day 12: Love lets the other
win
Do not merely look out for your own
personal interests, but also for the
interests of others.
—Philippians 2:4
TODAY’S DARE
Demonstrate love by willingly choosing
to give in to an area of disagreement
between you and your spouse. Tell them
you are putting their preference first.
Day 13: Love fights fair
If a house is divided against itself,
that
house will not be able to stand.
—Mark 3:25
TODAY’S DARE
Talk with your spouse about establishing
healthy rules of engagement. If your
mate is not ready for this, then write
out
your own personal rules to “fight” by.
Resolve to abide by them when the next
disagreement occurs.If a house is divided
against itself, that house will not be
able
to stand.
Day 14: Love takes delight
Enjoy life with the wife you love all the
days of your fleeting life.
—Ecclesiastes 9:9 HCSB
TODAY’S DARE
Purposefully neglect an activity you
would normally do so you can spend
quality time with your spouse. Do
something he or she would love to do or
a project they’d really like to work on.
Just be together.
Day 15: Love is honorable
Live with your wives in an understanding
way . . . and show her honor as a fellow
heir of the grace of life.
—1 Peter 3:7
TODAY’S DARE
Choose a way to show honor and respect
to your spouse that is above your normal
routine. It may be holding the door for
her. It might be putting his clothes away
for him. It may be the way you listen and
speak in your communication. Show
your mate that he or she is highly
esteemed in your eyes.
Day 16: Love intercedes
Beloved, I pray that in all respects you
may prosper and be in good health, just
as your soul prospers.
—3 John 2
TODAY’S DARE
Begin praying today for your spouse’s
heart. Pray for three specific areas
where
you desire for God to work in your
spouse’s life and in your marriage.
Day 17: Love promotes
intimacy
He who covers over an offense promotes
love, but whoever repeats the matter
separates close friends.
—Proverbs 17:9 NIV
TODAY’S DARE
Determine to guard your mate’s secrets
(unless they are dangerous to them or to
you) and to pray for them. Talk with
your spouse, and resolve to demonstrate
love in spite of these issues. Really
listen
to them when they share personal
thoughts and struggles with you. Make
them feel safe.
Day 18: Love seeks to
understand
How blessed is the man who finds
wisdom, and the man who gains
understanding.
—Proverbs 3:13
TODAY’S DARE
Prepare a special dinner at home, just
for
the two of you. The dinner can be as nice
as you prefer. Focus this time on getting
to know your spouse better, perhaps in
areas you’ve rarely talked about.
Determine to make it an enjoyable
evening for you and your mate.
Day 19: Love is impossible
Let us love one another, for love is from
God; and everyone who loves is born of
God and knows God.
—1 John 4:7
TODAY’S DARE
Look back over the dares from previous
days. Were there some that seemed
impossible to you? Have you realized
your need for God to change your heart
and to give you the ability to love? Ask
Him to show you where you stand with
Him, and ask for the strength and grace
to settle your eternal destination.
Day 20: Love is Jesus
Christ
While we were still helpless, at the
right
time Christ died for the ungodly.
—Romans 5:6
TODAY’S DARE
Dare to take God at His Word. Dare to
trust Jesus Christ for salvation. Dare to
pray, “Lord Jesus, I’m a sinner. But You
have shown Your love for me by dying
to forgive my sins, and You have proven
Your power to save me from death by
Your resurrection. Lord, change my
heart, and save me by Your grace.”
Day 21: Love is satisfied in
God
The Lord will continually guide you, and
satisfy your desire.
—Isaiah 58:11
TODAY’S DARE
Be intentional today about making a time
to pray and read your Bible. Try reading
a chapter out of Proverbs each day (there
are thirty-one—a full month’s supply),
or reading a chapter in the Gospels
(Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John). As
you do, immerse yourself in the love and
promises God has for you. This will add
to your growth as you walk with Him.
Day 22: Love is faithful
I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness.
Then you will know the Lord.
—Hosea 2:20 TODAY’S DARE
Love is a choice, not a feeling. It is an
initiated action, not a knee-jerk
reaction.
Choose today to be committed to love
even if your spouse has lost most of
their
interest in receiving it. Say to them
today
in words similar to these, “I love you.
Period. I choose to love you even if you
don’t love me in return.”
Day 23: Love always
protects
[Love] always protects.
—1 Corinthians 13:7 NIV
TODAY’S DARE
Remove anything that is hindering your
relationship, any addiction or influence
that’s stealing your affections and
turning your heart away from your
spouse.
Day 24: Love vs. Lust
The world is passing away, and also its
lusts; but the one who does the will of
God lives forever.
—1 John 2:17
TODAY’S DARE
End it now. Identify every object of lust
in your life and remove it. Single out
every lie you’ve swallowed in pursuing
forbidden pleasure and reject it. Lust
cannot be allowed to live in a back
bedroom. It must be killed and
destroyed—today—and replaced with
the sure promises of God and a heart
filled with His perfect love.
Day 25: Love forgives
What I have forgiven, if I have forgiven
anything, I did it for your sakes in the
presence of Christ.
—2 Corinthians 2:10
TODAY’S DARE
Whatever you haven’t forgiven in your
mate, forgive it today. Let it go. Just
as
we ask Jesus to “forgive us our debts”
each day, we must ask Him to help us
“forgive our debtors” each day as well.
Unforgiveness has been keeping you and
your spouse in prison too long. Say from
your heart, “I choose to forgive.”
Day 26: Love is responsible
When you judge another, you condemn
yourself, since you, the judge, do the
same things.
—Romans 2:1 HCSB
TODAY’S DARE
Take time to pray through your areas of
wrongdoing. Ask for God’s forgiveness,
then humble yourself enough to admit
them to your spouse. Do it sincerely and
truthfully. Ask your spouse for
forgiveness as well. No matter how they
respond, make sure you cover your
responsibility in love. Even if they
respond with criticism, accept it by
receiving it as counsel.
Day 27: Love encourages
Guard my soul and deliver me; do not let
me be ashamed, for I take refuge in You.
—Psalm 25:20
TODAY’S DARE
Eliminate the poison of unrealistic
expectations in your home. Think of one
area where your spouse has told you
you’re expecting too much, and tell them
you’re sorry for being so hard on them
about it. Promise them you’ll seek to
understand, and assure them of your
unconditional love.
Day 28: Love makes
sacrifices
He laid down His life for us. We should
also lay down our lives for our brothers.
—1 John 3:16 HCSB
TODAY’S DARE
What is one of the greatest needs in your
spouse’s life right now? Is there a need
you could lift from their shoulders today
by a daring act of sacrifice on your
part?
Whether the need is big or small,
purpose to do what you can to meet the
need.
Day 29: Love’s motivation
Render service with a good attitude, as
to the Lord and not to men.
—Ephesians 6:7 HCSB
TODAY’S DARE
Before you see your spouse again today,
pray for them by name and for their
needs. Whether it comes easy for you or
not, say “I love you,” then express love
to them in some tangible way. Go to God
in prayer again, thanking Him for giving
you the privilege of loving this one
special person—unconditionally, the
way He loves both of you.
Day 30: Love brings unity
Father, keep them in Your name, the
name which You have given Me, that
they may be one even as We are.
—John 17:11
TODAY’S DARE
Isolate one area of division in your
marriage, and look on today as a fresh
opportunity to pray about it. Ask the
Lord to reveal anything in your own
heart that is threatening oneness with
your spouse. Pray that He would do the
same for them. And if appropriate,
discuss this matter openly, seeking God
for unity.
Day 31: Love and marriage
A man shall leave his father and his
mother, and be joined to his wife; and
they shall become one flesh.
—Genesis 2:24
TODAY’S DARE
Is there a “leaving” issue you haven’t
been brave enough to conquer yet?
Confess it to your spouse today, and
resolve to make it right. The oneness of
your marriage is dependent upon it.
Follow this with a commitment to your
spouse and to God to make your
marriage the top priority over every
other human relationship.
Day 32: Love meets sexual
needs
The husband must fulfill his duty to his
wife, and likewise also the wife to her
husband.
—1 Corinthians 7:3
TODAY’S DARE
If at all possible, try to initiate sex
with
your husband or wife today. Do this in a
way that honors what your spouse has
told you (or implied to you) about what
they need from you sexually. Ask God to
make this enjoyable for both of you as
well as a path to greater intimacy.
Day 33: Love completes
each other
If two lie down together they keep warm,
but how can one be warm alone?
—Ecclesiastes 4:11
TODAY’S DARE
Recognize that your spouse is integral to
your future success. Let them know
today that you desire to include them in
your upcoming decisions, and that you
need their perspective and counsel. If
you have ignored their input in the past,
admit your oversight and ask them to
forgive you.
Day 34: Love celebrates
godliness
[Love] does not rejoice in
unrighteousness, but rejoices with the
truth.
—1 Corinthians 13:6
TODAY’S DARE
Find a specific, recent example when
your spouse demonstrated Christian
character in a noticeable way. Verbally
commend them for this at some point
today.
Day 35: Love is
accountable
Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with
many advisers they succeed.
—Proverbs 15:22 NIV
TODAY’S DARE
Find a marriage mentor—someone who
is a strong Christian and who will be
honest and loving with you. If you feel
that counseling is needed, then take the
first step to set up an appointment.
During this process, ask God to direct
your decisions and discernment.
Day 36: Love is God’s
Word
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a
light to my path.
—Psalm 119:105
TODAY’S DARE
Commit to reading the Bible every day.
Find a devotional book or other resource
that will give you some guidance. If your
spouse is open to it, see if they will
commit to daily Bible reading with you.
Begin submitting each area of your life
to its guidance and start building on the
rock.
Day 37: Love agrees
in
prayer
If two of you agree on earth about
anything that they may ask, it shall be
done for them by My Father.
—Matthew 18:19
TODAY’S DARE
Ask your spouse if you can begin
praying together. Talk about the best
time to do this, whether it’s in the
morning, your lunch hour, or before
bedtime. Use this time to commit your
concerns, disagreements, and needs
before the Lord. Don’t forget to thank
Him for His provision and blessing.
Even if your spouse refuses to do this,
resolve to spend this daily time in
prayer
yourself.
Day 38: Love fulfills
dreams
Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will
give you the desires of your heart.
—Psalm 37:4
TODAY’S DARE
Ask yourself what your mate would want
if it was obtainable. Commit this to
prayer, and start mapping out a plan for
meeting some (if not all) of their
desires,
to whatever level you possibly can.
Day 39: Love endures
Love never fails.
—1 Corinthians 13:8
TODAY’S DARE
Spend time in personal prayer, then write
a letter of commitment and resolve to
your spouse. Include why you are
committing to this marriage until death,
and that you have purposed to love them
no matter what. Leave it in a place that
your mate will find it.
Day 40: Love is a covenant
Where you go, I will go, and where you
lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be
my people, and your God, my God.
—Ruth 1:16
TODAY’S DARE
Write out a renewal of your vows and
place them in your home. Perhaps, if
appropriate, you could make
arrangements to formally renew your
wedding vows before a minister and with
family present. Make it a living
testament to the value of marriage in
God’s eyes and the high honor of being
one with your mate.
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